needing.space

Can’t really write, i’m feeling super sick but i need to write something to keep up the routine

almost done w/ BrBa. excited to finish. Stayed up late tonight to watch extra episodes.

i think i’m sick because i didn’t feel hungry so i forgot to eat and then i ate but felt sick from it.

ugh i hope it goes away soon.

I started to read the total money makeover because I realized you can rent audiobooks from the library. It’s good but the guy narrating it (probably the author) is kind of a jerk? he yells a lot lmao. also, I found a bunch more books i want to try.

but in the spirit of getting my finances on track, i finally did my budget after ignoring it for months and whew… i should not have ignored it. gotta get my shit together.

at least i’m mostly out of the woods thankfully.

my friend Courtney introduced me to Be:First today. Either I won’t care or i’ll get sucked up instantly, there’s no in between… haha.

Nothing else to say except Wal Mart forgot like $50 worth of groceries so there’s that. the bastards…

Went to the cat cafe today. It was fun but thankfully none of the cats grew on me enough that I would want to adopt them.

Tomorrow, we will be seeing Florence for the first time in a few years to do her painting class. It should be fun. The only thing I’m sad about is that it’s on a Sunday night which is seriously unfortunate timing for anyone who works a 9 to 5 like we do. Still, it will be nice to see her again.

Mike died on Breaking Bad tonight ☹️ Goddamn you Walt, you fucker. He was one of the best characters. At least we get to see more of him in Better Call Saul.

kind of too tired to write much. today was fine except for when i got dizzy + shaky + migraine from forgetting to eat.

gabby announced she’s quitting which sucks nuts for me, but i’m happy for her. just worried the next person is going to be micro managing + i don’t like that. anna said she’s going to let herself be fired but i think she’s just being over dramatic as usual.

apple pen came today + i can’t even use it until the ipad comes in next week :( i want an ipad! it’s been forever since i used ios.. used to love my ipod touch.

nighty XOXO ps: cat cafe tomorrow ♡♡♡

i bought an ipad today, it should come in a week. i’m surprised apple gave me 1k worth of financing, but i appreciate it haha.

if i find a way to move this journal digitally, i might end up doing that. it would probably be more efficient than this. apparently this paper is 8X11 and the ipad is 10.2 inches so it won’t be much smaller than this notebook.

i am excited for it to arrive! i will mostly use it for planning. i won’t really notice it in my budget either because im about to pay off my phone which costs more or less the same.

i got 256gb to try and future-proof it. ipads can last years if you take care of them - it will have no resale value bc i engraved my name tho hahaha not that i ever sell my electronics anyway.

nothing bad going on except breaking bad is getting really good. i finally near the end of season 4 where gus gets killed. i don’t remember much about who is the antagonist in season 5 tho so it’s going to be news to me work is boring as always lots of trainings this week, but none tomorrow, just my meeting w/ gabby.

we set up a painting class with florence this weekend, so on top of the cat cafe, it’s going to be busy. im excited!

sad steve canceled his visit tho, sad that im the one who always has to make the effort. its bullshit. anyway tiktok time

i want to buy a planner but i’m trying not to spend money. ugh i try so hard to be “good” and it still feels like i’m constantly broke, anyway so like who even cares?

i went to the horses today and that was fun. even though Lacey was busy so we had a different wrangler, who took us back 15 min early, like… that’s messed up man. we paid for an hour lesson, we already didn’t make you teach us anything, but ur still going to bring us back early… wow.

anyways it can’t be helped i have a dumb training tomorrow but at least Elias is in it too.

okay hand hurts so byeee

today was so dumb! the water thing outside broke so i tried to fix it and i got drenched! plus on top of that, we were playing isaac using a R-key seed and after an hour into the run i accidentally took another active item and it glitches out when it’s on two player and turns it into a different item! wtf… -_-

today has just been too stressful. i hope tomorrow is better. we have horses tomorrow so hopefully that will cheer me up!- except that it’s record highs and has been in the hundreds and is supposed to rain… uh oh

had a hell of a day. couldn’t sleep all last night and when i did sleep it was just trauma nightmares.

plus i screwed up @ work, i don’t even know why they keep me w/how much i screw up. i feel bad and especially embarrassed because it’s my boss that keeps catching it, like… ugh.

talking to Raven helped a lot though. she helped a lot today. she put away the groceries and took care of the animals while i took a nap. i don’t deserve to be treated so kindly, but you don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

here’s to hoping for fewer nightmares and way fewer mistakes @ work before they decide i’m totally useless…

today was pretty boring so not much to talk about here.. just took phil to church, played a little isaac, and slept. had a headache and migraine auras all day, so didn’t really feel like doing anything else but that. also got some starbucks while waiting for phil to get out and talked to dad a little bit

need to sleep now midnight